Friday, October 24, 2008
tell me that i am wrong.
i am bitching around again.
tell me that i am not jealous.
that i am not envious.
that i am not insecure once more.
sounds stupid but in fact it isn't to me.
telling the truth,
i am jealous then.
everyone just crowds around you.
i mean everyone that i knows does that.
you are just so popular, u dint realize that though.
forget it.
keep it to myself then.
as a matter of fact, i dont know what i am doing now.
feeling upset, angry or what so ever.
anyone would want someone to pay attention to him/her.
at least one. not being a greedy person that is.
who would be that one?
these just hits me back to the place that i was once in.
tell me friends are trustworthy.
and they are not those people who just did hypocrite stuff.
i was left with scars.
nobody wanted that to happen again.
neither the person who hurt me. thats what i believe.
thats just the world.
i was slapped in the face today. (analogy)
when i suddenly got pissed off.
no reason for it i guess.
just being stupid for a moment i think that is.
sorry for what i had done.
things i thought that would be a big matter is actually a small matter to other people.
so this is what i had learnt.
NEVER ever put myself into their shoes.
and think for them.
cause it would never turn out the same as what i had thought.
this is one way that i could prevent myself from doing the stupid thing again.
and getting pissed with myself.
everythings over. end of story. the END.
having friends hurt, having no friends hurt too.
what should i do? i am lost again.
bring me smile.7:59 PM
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
these few days i had been troubling myself with weird questions.
perhaps i am a weird person myself.
always find myself trouble.
fyp. its something everyone that will go through in tertiary school.
just have to bear everything and enjoy the outcome.
no matter if its good or bad.
at least we tried our best.
this is what i always say.
"at least we tried our best"
sounds stupid or dumb. but i think its true.
what else can i say to comfort myself?
maybe i should look at another view.
just work hard for now, so that i would not to comforting myself and yet congratulating myself!!
yes! i should think that way!! no regrets would be made then!
today is just a headache.
went to DHL early in the morning. sun is scorching.
and i am damn tired! rest my eyes on the bus.
explored the places. it was blasting cold!
then went back to school to do the ppt.
edmund chan PMS! god! mood swings!
long 3rd meeting. =((
just to earn that damn grade.
and surprisely my team got 2nd for the vote thingy.
people changed.
changed from ever best friends to just a hi-bye friend.
isnt it just pathetic?
and worst of all, i am the one who caused this result.
regrets?
frankly, yes.
was not in the right mind to think then. but whatever it is.
result had been made. nothing could be done.
i actually had plans to go back to Archery.
but things had been stopping me.
maybe the once familiar scenes or faces or things are now the most unfamiliar things to me now.
lack of courage. no face to see.
haas. dint imagine that i would be in such situation.
nevermind.
i will be moving house, friends!!
i will not be late!!! anymore!!
but cant go interchange meet the rest. =/
pros and cons. choose one!
and one sad news!
everyone is going to Thailand except for ME!!!!
they are going on the 22nd Nov. i had test on 24th Nov.
sad life for me. =(((
somethings are better left unsaid.
bring me smile.9:46 PM
Friday, October 03, 2008
yuhoo!~
i am so back to my updates in the middle of the night. =)
i am still so sick. not exactly sick. just still having my headaches.
maybe i should sleep earlier to aid that problem. =x
having my fyp meeting earlier on after school. i nearly missed it!!!
how forgetful am i!!! if i dint heard the phone ring, i bet i will miss that meeting.
and i will be dead by then.
i am still having my no-life days.
everyday after school, back to home.
i am such a no-life kiddo!!
and i hate that!!
i need to get a new life! although its only a few months then i am going to graduate.
i went to blog-hopped. happen to see a blog. which is Archery Ig.
surprised! went through the posts. looks fun! maybe it was way much more fun in real life.
guessed i missed those funs. =)
feeling grumpy now. =P
just complained to someone. it was rather random.
cause i just cut that person off after that. sorry!! biyaneii*(sorry in korean)
some parts of me rationally wants to go back. but it is way too awkward!!
maybe it isnt. but i just felt that way alright.
just let me stay grumpy for awhile.
P.S* im grumpy. not emo alright. =P
saw ji yuan today. chat for awhile. we really need to sit down and have a little chat.
BUT without those cold jokes. i really cant stand them. =))
maybe that day would be Sarah's mini party.
no idea whether im attending anot. cause its like weird?
me with her bunch of best buddies? just like a outsider ya know?
but when im actually one of her the other best budd.
contradicting* =/
i should cut it out. and let my brain rest after today's UT.
byes~
Pain is inevitable; Suffering is optional.
bring me smile.1:11 AM
simple minded.